Estrella had stepped with her bare foot into the wet. The fresh blacktop had baked all day in the heat, and was still slightly warm in the summer rain despite the dark hour.
Now her own tears had quite bored her from the late afternoon onward, but that didn't stop them from forcing their way out, leaking sporadically in clumsy gobs between one task and another. Her whole household was asleep. The whole neighborhood was long past quiet. She could be with her own self now, truly, and she breathed the night. It quickened her step to a run, long hair streaming behind, stuck to her bare arms also, drops from the light rain riding her curls. She slowed now, a light laugh adorning her mouth and nose. Her heart had returned to her, and they were again on friendly terms. Her pale skirt, full at the bottom, had taken on water. Ah, well.
She had thought, initially, to bring the baby along on her adventure, to protect her from actively seeking her own damage. Ridiculous, of course, as little Eliza should be protected from any humans seeking to do harm this late. Or early. The hour, Estrella. The hour.
Eliza lay snugly in her crib, snoring lightly, dreaming maybe, and in G*d's arms. Estrella wondered if she was in any G*d's arms at all at the moment, and a small dry laugh, but she knew she felt good. So there was G*d in it somewhere, must be. Felt less like a partnership, more like sibling rivalry. But was G*d with her? Most definitely. Relief. Night. Walking. She delighted in her stride, feeling her muscles working, an orchestra to carry her body where she chose. Why was being alive so much easier at night? She wondered suddenly how far away she was, two miles? More? Maybe not so wise in bare feet to keep going. All right. She found a large puddle, shallow, clean. She swiped her right foot through the tepid water lengthwise. She had wanted that feeling, which was as expected, and enjoyed the visual effects that pools of water always afford.
In her mind, she began to turn home (with regret), and then she turned her body in the same direction. A bit of fear crept up. Well, that was a surprise. She quickened her pace a bit, wondering why she hadn't borrowed someone's dog for the little sojourn. Ah yes. Because at the start of it, her & her heart had lost touch. Thus, there was no fear of harm due to no awareness of her own value. Less painful that way to be sure. Less painful without love, yet the walking death is it's own brand of hell, and the soul will fight to break it. "Thank G*D!" She shouted in the general direction of the sky. "Thank Youuuuuuu..."